So why Finicky?

When I finally settle on a biography for page one of the website a suitable explanation won't get lost in the posts of the blog. For now, here is that post. I've been stuck at home as a stay at home mom for approximately four years. I haven't tried to have a job for about 3 years. There is not much of a point. I have a son who has asd. Finding a daycare capable of giving him the care that he needs while taking care of other children is near impossible. Then, to try to find a single individual to watch ONE child, just mine, the price gets really unreasonable and I pretty much would end up working to pay the sitter and barely taking home any income at all. In an effort to be able to fund my art, which is therapy on its own, I started selling it. This is one of the points where I first was quite, finicky. I have an attachment to my art as I am sure that a lot of people who create also do. I'm really happy and grateful when someone loves my art enough to buy it. To pay my worth for my time and skill. I miss each piece when it goes and sometimes I am full of regret. It is this regret for the loss of these hard worked on loved pieces that sometimes makes me regress and slide back into not wanting to sell anything.

Then as I was exposed to other creators I realized that the old hobby of making jewelry with beads was a thing and people were selling them. I was wow'd because I stopped doing this on account that I thought and was convinced by others that this was childish. So I also started making jewelry with more grown up beads made of gems. This is a hard sell. I wasn't trying to compete with those who were already out there and successful. I could make jewelry forever. I cannot wear it all. Eventually as-well money invested would essentially be turned into hoarding creations if I didn't try to sell them to at least break even. So even though I don't ask much over the material value of the things that I sell, I often feel guilt. Maybe this is related to when you buy something for yourself and decide to resell because you no longer need it people haggle you. So even though you are making something new, there are still some people who will view it as second hand and feel they have the right to barter. Stress, guilt and pressure come from this. I have in the past from these feelings become overwhelmed and reseeded into silence. Losing some followers in the process because of being so, Finicky.

So here we are now stepping into the subject of selling crystals. As a buyer, I always wondered how can you get so many beautiful things into your possession and then be willing to part with them again and again and again. Or buy something for yourself that you wanted so badly and decide to sell it later. I think I get it now. I have let go a few skulls, which I call 'Big Boys,' That I had originally bought with the intent to sell, backed out of trying to sell because I grew attached, and today they are now SOLD. It always feels good to make a little bit of profit of something that was intended to do exactly that. It feeds me and makes me want to do more.

As an anxious person though there is always the risk that I could relapse back to the shadows again. One thing remains true, if I say something can be yours, ITS YOURS. Until you say never-mind anyway. So rest assured, even though the shop name 'TheFinickyShopkeeper' is astutely apt, I'm always here to get you what you need, at the best price that I can give it to you for.